Friday, December 29, 2006

The One With The Hearing Problem

I was diagnosed with "moderate" hearing loss in my late teens. The resulting psychological trauma was hard to handle and I am still trying to deal with it to this day. Here's a brief glimpse into my world (and to those who share my special affliction) as seen through your eyes if you were me:

1. You wonder why they always always keep the tv/radio volume on low.

2. You have to read the book so you can understand the movie you had seen.

3. You don't want people to talk for fear that you might not hear them.

4. You have to keep saying "I beg your pardon" for the millionth time.

5. They laugh at someone's joke and you are left wondering.

6. They ask "Any questions?" and you want to ask them to repeat all that they've just said.

7. Your hearing aid magnifies the sounds which you can already hear and it doesn't help you with the ones you can't hear in the first place.

8. You get irritated when the subtitles don't work in the movies even though you know the language.

9. You wish there were subtitles in real life (somehow).

10. You lose it when people think you are dumb when the real thing is that your ears are taking an indefinite vacation (and maybe you should just shout it out: "I am DEAF, okay!!?).

11. You are curious about sign language.

12. You believe that Shakespeare should have written: "To hear or not to hear, that is the question".

Shrugs. Stops typing(really!?). Remembers that there's lots of things to do. Goes about it :)

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Far Away, In a Distant Galaxy...

Its funny when you are grown up and old (like me, all bent and bed-ridden at 25 ;-), and you start reminiscing of the days when you were young and the times you used to spend with your siblings. Just today, I was browsing up "fantasy" in wikipedia and I stumble on this article on Visionaries. Its a science fantasy cartoon Rejy, Reni and I used to keep seeing when we were in our early teens. We had borrowed the video cassette (yes, those ancient 1" x 4" x 7 1/2" rectangle-like-cuboids) from our favorite cousins, Ashley and Asha (no orkut profile yet). They are related to us by the fact that both our mothers share the same mother (and father, ofcourse!). We never got around to returning it to them but we did utilize it to the max by watching it during days when the tv was showing some random shit (remember, this was before you ever heard of cable tv). Numerous repetitions of the thing resulted in the three of us memorizing the story word for word. During the summer, when it got real hot down there in the Sharjah Desert (or during long boring rides in the car), we used to wile away the time taking turns in reciting the dialogues. It was fun imitating the accent too, especially shouting out the magical powers of each of the character in the story. Here's the opening sequence of the cartoon for you to savor.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Figuring Out the Most Important Thing in the World

I have always been interested in plumbing people. And more than doing this to other two-legs, I always take delight in getting to know myself. Must be because of the apparent close proximity between the mind and body that it makes me think that I can almost grasp it with my hands. But Oh! How elusive and mysterious is the task of opening the secret rooms in my head in the hope of making practical magic such as unlimited intelligence or divine healing for this ego-shattered mortal such as myself. May there be an answer to the Sacred Question of "Who Am I?".

Xmas Two Double O Six

Its surprising for a Leo to be spending, of all things, Christmas alone. Since my kind is associated with various types of joyous pursuits, its hard to fathom the fact that I am spending this season only with my own esteemed presence. I guess, my current state of unemployment (and the resulting confusion) helped churn out this "very opposite of interesting" turn of events.

So, I ordered myself a parcel of biryani and rented out the japanese movie Sanjuro to see for the second time. It's a must see. My favorite part is when the protagonist belts out the line: "(My name is) Sanjuro, 30 year old. Going on 40". In the end, it all evened out.

PS: I do recommend Akira Kurosawa's movies, my favorite being Seven Samurai, Yojimbo and Sanjuro. And Hiroshi Inagaki's Samurai (I, II and III). In all of them, we have Toshiro Mifune playing the lead and snarling his way to glory.

A Very and Merry Christmas to all! Now for the Lion to get some sleep.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Orkut and the Art of Being Cool

When my sister Reny handed her orkut profile to be maintained by the oh-so-knowledgeable-computer-whiz. (Ahem! That will be me), due to internet scarcity at her hostel, I did not foresee the inevitable avalanche of troubled and lonesome souls who would want to cast themselves at her profile. Scraps like "I want to make friend with you" and "I just came across your profile and I wanted to say hello" smell of loud desperation. So now, my major task consists of doing elimination rounds on candidates wanting to be friends with my little sis. I know! The whole thing smacks of big brother-ism. And ironically, I am helpless. After facing the first wave of testerone charged males, I had to ask my sister on whether I should continue to do whatever I was doing with her stuff. When she said yes, I pondered on the task laid out to me and I decided I would just have to be cool about it. After all, I can sympathize with the "i need love" feeling running around people's (read guys) minds. So, when I see an unknown scrap, I just ignore it. When there is a friend request, I just do a little homework on the person (check out his communities / profile / ask sis whether she knows him) and just kick him out if it’s just some random dude.

PS: Reny does log-in to her profile and she is the only one who scraps or sends friend requests to her friends since doing that is a big no-no for me. Just want to assure her friends that all messages coming from her profile is a 100% Reny genuine :-)

And since I am done with narrating my ever-continuous ordeal, I think some tips for members of the same sex are in order:

1. First of all, grow up and get a life! You ought to be better than just having a presence on the web. Be good at something or a number of things (like playing a musical instrument, or developing some other skill). Something which will make you interested in yourself.

2. Realize that chicks join online communities mainly to connect with their long lost friends and/or current people in their lives.

3. If you really want to get to know girls, do so in REAL LIFE first (that will be another blog-post @ my blog-spot OR do a google search ;-). Then when you are on talking terms with her (and thus, a friend), ask her whether she is into orkut/facebook/gazzag/hi5/friendster/myspace/whatever. When she gives you her profile id, you send a friend request and scrap away to kingdom come.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

The Making of a Star

"Focus, practice and passion
thats what makes a star*"

*Mphasis ad in the Appointments section of The Times of India (6/12/6)

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Going Randy

"Now everybody has a book that has changed his or her life. The Holy Bible. Das Kapital. Tuesdays With Maury. Everything I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. Whatever."
--Linus Torvalds, Just for Fun

In my case the winner is "For the New Intellectual" by Ayn Rand. Check Objectivism out.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Dhoom Machale

So! I was watching Dhoom (part one) with my little cousins, Kuku and Deol, today. And this scene comes up when John Abraham trashes a newly acquired car, stolen by one of his gang member, by running it over a cliff. I turn around to make out my cousins' impression of the part and I notice that Deol has this look of wonder on his face. After a pause, he exclaims without the slightest shred of doubt: "John Abraham only wants Bikes and doesn't like Cars!!". Yeah right :-)